Fast forward two years – I’m BACK!

Image courtesy of duron123 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image courtesy of duron123 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

WOW…it has seriously been almost two years since I’ve written.  I cannot believe it!  It’s amazing how quickly time flies and all that can happen in a year, actually closer to two years.  Soooo…a quick version…

First, I revamped the blog!  New dreams, new start, new look!

Second, the Relentless Dreamers group has dismantled; not for any particular reason…maybe life got in the way, possibly people weren’t ready, everyone has their own reasons.  However, I am a Relentless Dreamer and will always be.  In fact, I am actively pursuing my dreams more than I ever have before.  Jeez…I did say a quick recap, huh.  Ok…the group dismantled…I was working in Corporate America and got laid off; prior to my getting laid off I started an organizing business and decided to stay on that path post lay off.  You know what though?  Have you ever people say “just get started” when it comes to your goals?  I know, I’m rambling but stay with me for a minute, it’s been a few years.  So many times people feel that the perfect plan needs to be in place before getting started with their dreams but that’s not true.  What I’ve learned is that once you get started things move, things happen and clarity comes.  As I pursued this organizing business and events came into play, I realized that there was another thing I was supposed to be doing; connected to organizing but involving way more.  I realized I was supposed to move towards helping Autism/SPD and/or ADHD families organize their lives by teaching life skills and providing organizing tools specific to their children’s and family needs.  Once I I got that clarity it was like the doors opened wide!  Opportunities began to show up out of nowhere, I suddenly knew how to talk to people and (semi) market my business and the inner conflict that I struggled so much with was suddenly gone.  It was amazing!  Ok, I got that out.  Thanks for staying with me.

Now back to dreaming…I know why people tend to just dream about dreaming…it’s scary to pursue them!  Boy, is it scary and knowing what to expect in the less than completely satisfying life, even if it isn’t the life you want, is more comforting, in a lot of ways, than facing the unknown.  Moving forward in a cloud of unknown, hoping that what you’re doing isn’t crazy can feel like a roller coaster.  Personally speaking, one day I move forward with all the confidence in the world and the next day I do nothing toward my dreams and think “who am I to think I can do this?!”, “Why do I think I know anything that people are willing to pay for?!” or how about this: “I’m tired of working for no money!!”.  AGGHHHHH!!!  Of course, I expected to work my butt off with no money coming in for a while but being in the midst of it is another story; being in the midst of it is another story all the way around.  Due to this and more…

I need an outlet, I need to express myself on this path to accomplishing my dreams and I figured what better place to do this than my “dream” blog.  I hope you’ll join me for the journey.  If not, I respect that. I’m grateful you’ve been with me during this silent period. But…if you stay, I am sure it will get more interesting as time goes on.  Glad you joined the ride and stay tuned!

Never NEVER give up on your dreams…

#Fail – Are you sure you failed?

One of my dreams is to become the best parent I can be.  To me, that means to love and support my son, to validate him, truly hear and see him, correct, guide and teach him and most of all, love him.  Not simply love him in a way I know how to love but in a way that he knows and receives naturally.  Some(a lot of)times to do these things I have to die to myself, meaning accept that I don’t know all.  I accept that there are things I need to improve and learn to do in terms of connecting with him.  I must be willing to admit to him that I messed up and move through my own discomfort and past (that follow me to current) hurts.  With all of that…sometimes I fail.  Sometimes, even with all my reading, implementing and trying, I fail.  It just doesn’t come across right or our communication isn’t on the same wavelength.  Other times, my “new” approach is “correct” but my son isn’t responding the way I expected him to so I deem it a failure.  In fact, a lot of times the result of trying to parent him feels like a #fail BUT IT ISN’T!

I speak of my son and my desires to parent him because it’s a daily thing for me.  It is truly a dream of mine to raise a healthy and wholesome child, emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually.  However, this situation can come up in several scenarios.  You try at marketing a business and nothing happens in the time you set.  #Fail.  You  try to make a new dish and it is nasty as ever.  #Fail.  You dream of taking the GRE and finally take it and literally fail the test.  #Fail.  You save a certain amount of money in a preset time frame and then Murphy comes to visit, to which you have to apply that saved money.  #Fail.   If I give you one more scenario you may scream at me to shut up and move on…I get it, and so do you. 🙂

The question to ask yourself is “Are these really failures?”.  We each create our own definition of failure for subjective dreams but I would dare to guarantee that majority of them are not actually failures.  The not-so-amazing results can be viewed as tries and/or attempts and that definitely counts for something.  You don’t stay in what you know and fail to act.  They are lessons because when tasting that dish, I bet you think “if I put more of this or less of that the dish would be better”.  If you save that money and have it use it on the unexpected, you still prove to yourself that you actually can save money and you can meet a goal.  The only true failure in this world is failing to act at all because in that we remain static.  Nothing in this world is meant to remain static.  So, move…move with no inhibitions and don’t worry about failing.  Movement creates results and results create lessons and even if it is not the lesson you anticipate, it is the lesson you need.  Move toward your dreams, for if you don’t, you have surely failed.

photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/prettyuglydesign/4673681658/

I quit! And then I “met” my Dream Team.

Yesterday I quit! I quit the blog, the dream group, life coaching, even Christianity and if my livelihood wouldn’t have been jeopardized I would have quit my job too.  (Actually, that would have been first.)  Luckily, no one knew. LOL!  I laugh but I’m so serious.  I quit it all (internally) and was having a temper tantrum by my lonesome until I reached out to two friends, who are also fellow Relentless Dreamers.  One sympathized and let me get it all out. She let me know it was okay to have those feelings and that she understood.  The other let me get it out and poured back into me by telling me how much what I do affects others and how I can lean on those same people I pour into when I need to, to lift me up.  I needed both friends and their shoulders to make it through that rough patch.  Today I was talking to a co-worker/friend and told her about my resignation to life.  She looked at me and burst out laughing, to which I couldn’t help but to burst out laughing, too.  It was quite hilarious.  I quit for a day, everything that is important to me…everything that makes me, me…everything that I dream of doing (minus the job) that fuels me and my spirit and that I feel is my life’s purpose.

Why would I do such a thing when I feel so strongly about those things?  Because some days are HARD!  Sometimes there’s no rhyme or reason as to why the day is hard and other times one thing can happen to which you allow it to set the tone for the whole day.  Either way…it trickles into everything and it just gets hard and overwhelming.  Everyone has and/or will get to a point where they want to quit, no matter how awesome the dream/goal/desire is because it can be hard work!  The greatest part in this and the thing that makes my heart sing about my 24-hour episode (actually it may have been 9 hours :|) is that I had a “net” to catch me.  I have been busy trying to help fuel other people to fulfill their dreams, along with myself, and the one “side-affect” that was unrealized was that I built my own safety net; my own Dream Team, if you will.

People like to think that success (however you define it) happens miraculously.  You tend not to think of the grind and the forced motion forward that occurs when you feel you just can’t push anymore. But that happens!  That WILL happen and in your own strength, you may quit for longer than I did!  However, if you have a dream team you’ll remember why you started down this path in the first place. My own definition of a Dream Team is a group of people you can talk to about the way you feel, about the struggles, the challenges, the joys, the desires.  They are people who pour back into you the way you pour into them; people who remind you of everything you’re doing, how it’s affecting them/others and why you’re doing it.  When you have these types of people to go to when you call a time out you won’t quit for long!  Whether you’re reignited with a blazing fire or just a little flame to get you to take one more step…it’s moving you forward and providing you with the support, motivation and comfort that you need to move toward your dreams.  You NEED a Dream Team!  Pursuing dreams are too hard on your own.

Who does your Dream Team consist of?  If you don’t have one, work on getting one.  You won’t regret it. 🙂

Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Shine Time! The beginnings of big things.

In the beginning…haha! Not sure about that start but it makes me think of Genesis.  Seriously, I know in the beginning I stated that this blog would highlight the stories of the Relentless Dreamers.  If you missed that, check out my first post, Blame It On The Book!.  One thing I know and am re-learning is that building a dream isn’t instantaneous.  It takes time, patience and determination.  I mention that to express that I wish I could come on here and have bang up stories already like so and so wanted to start a business and she did and she quit her full-time job already!! Her business is booming and she’s living the life!  But I can’t. lol  There’s nothing wrong with that, though, because the reality of what we’re doing, dream building, is that it is a process and going through a process takes time.  It’s a journey and we are going to enjoy the journey.  And in that journey, we need to make sure to celebrate the milestones, not just look towards the big ultimate goal…and so we shine!

All fellow Relentless Dreamers came into the group with their own dreams, desires and wishes and we each have our own story.  I’m taking a moment to celebrate some milestones.  A fellow RD-er came into the group wanting a new job, to get to know God more personally and wanting to volunteer.  Since starting the group she has been attending church regularly and enjoying the services!  She has had an interview for a promotion within her current company and has had several interviews with other companies.  Nothing has come through yet, but she is moving forward and making progress. She is also currently in the process of obtaining a volunteer position at a local shelter.  Another Dreamer came into the group with the foundation of her company already set but desires to launch it fully and work it full-time.  She has built social media outlets for her company and has been working those diligently, daily.  She recently joined the local Chamber of Commerce and is on her way to absorbing all of the knowledge that she can from the people there and she is using her creativity.  The next Dreamer desired to get back into the workforce, get back on the healthy eating track and learn how to swim.  Since stating these desires she has created an amazing resume and submitted for a position, she’s been eating so healthy that she’s caused me to really focus on my eating habits (:|) and has gathered the information for swim classes and has a plan to start them.  Another dreamer stated that she wants to join a running club and desires to run a 5k.  She has since joined the running club and has signed up for a 5k run in the next few months.  And last but not least (for this post), yours truly, stated dreams of wanting to start a life coaching business and become a blogger and, as you know, I created a blog and have been posting to it and today I got my first client!

I say CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL for these milestones.  Milestones build the wall, piece by piece, as long as we keep moving forward.  All of the Relentless Dreamers were not noted above but all stories will be shared as more dreams develop!  Celebrate with us, follow us and share your own Shine Time stories!

 

Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Are You Really Letting THEM Stop You?!

Andrew Carnegie said “Anything in life worth having is worth working for”.  Having dreams is an amazing thing and going through the process of making them come true takes grit, determination, passion, humor (there will be many moments to laugh at yourself), relentlessness and many other adjectives.  Making dreams come true so that you are able to live the life you imagined can take hard work.  So, what happens when you get tired?  What happens when you don’t feel like moving toward your dream(s) anymore?  When you just want to quit!  When you, at least, want a break (which can lead to quitting)!  There’s some dream propelling action you know you need to do, something you know you want to do, but you just don’t feel like doing it!  This can happen so easily and come in many forms.  Dreams you start off excited about seem to get hard to attain and then the excitement shrivels.  Circumstances may happen in your life that throw you off kilter and you just don’t have the energy or motivation anymore.  People around you laugh or snicker when you mention what you’re doing and it deflates you (I mean seriously, you thought these people were your biggest supporters!).  There are a plethora of ways that your once gung-ho, non-stop, ready to go, Tony Robbins motivated self can plummet down to the level of a young child who simply refuses to do as asked…who just won’t and will cause all kinds of ruckus if you continue to try to persuade him/her.

So, what do you do?  Because more than anything, you really want this dream, you really need this but it seems like YOU are the one you’re fighting (which is true more times than not).  I’ve read many books in my lifetime.  Ask most anyone that really knows me and they’ll tell you that I’m a book nut, really an information seeker to the fullest extent so I have gathered an abundance of information in this beautifully small head of mine.  (This is how I’ve determined that I’m qualified to share my thoughts with you, whether you think so or not – HA!… that, and I’m open to throwing my own experiences in the mix.)  Here’s my breakthrough and I hope it’s a breakthrough for you…I CANNOT ALLOW MY FEELINGS TO CONTROL ME.  Feelings are just that, they are FEEL-ings.  They allow people to experience a certain reaction within the mind, which usually trickles down to the body, as a response to various things that occur externally.  However, feelings are based off of information that people create in their own heads, their own perceptions, and feelings can be wrong (seriously!).  Feelings can also be right but at the end of the day you know what is right and what is wrong…period.  You know what works and what doesn’t.

POP QUIZ!

  1. If I want to go to the ice cream shop to get the chocolate chunk brownie ice cream that I love, will I get there if I continue to sit on my couch scrolling my Facebook news feed?
  2. If I want to learn Spanish will I learn it by taking a French class?
  3. If I want to go to Greece but I spend all my money on my sneaker collection will I end up in Greece? (Maybe, but not by the way I wish you go get there. 😉 )

Do you get my point?  You know what’s up! You know what you need to do but you let your feelings dictate what you will do.  DON’T DO THAT ANYMORE!  Feelings are not you! They don’t control you, they are one part of you that YOU control.

Here’s the deal…when you don’t feel like working toward your dream(s) and you know taking action is best for you, it’s moving you forward, it’s what you need…you take one step at a time towards it in spite of your feelings.  Go as far as to humanize your feelings and have a “competition” with them (if competition gets you going).  You do what you KNOW to do.  Push the feelings aside.  Tell them “you are just one part of me and I am in charge now!”.  Yes, TELL THEM!  I know I do…ALL the time (real talk – I haven’t felt like writing a new post, this post, but I NEED to – it’s good for me, it’s good for you and it’s moving US forward).  Let’s take one step at a time…together.  One…………..two………three……four… (Notice that the more steps that are getting done, the closer together they get. More to come on this phenomenon.)

Let me know where your steps lead you even when you aren’t feeling it!

Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Don’t Live Life Without It!

Last week I had a rare opportunity to revert back to some years ago which was a “revert” but at the same time, it wasn’t.  Sometimes I make things so complicated.  Here’s what I’m saying.  Last week I was kid free!  I SAID…LAST WEEK I WAS KID FREE!!!  I may have to explain some of this excitement, as some of you may be thinking “what’s the big deal?”.  Until this summer I have never been away from my child for more than 1 overnight stay…NEVER.  I had two opportunities this summer; I went away for a week earlier this summer and this past week my child went “away” for a week.  So…now that you know this, please jump up and down and get excited for me!  I was KID FREE!  I love, love, LOVE my child, but there is something to be said for having complete me-time, responsibility-free time, back to eating cereal for dinner time if that’s what you chose to do.

During this free time, I had a ball!  This is where the “revert but at the same time wasn’t a revert” comment comes in.  Pre-child-me, had a ton of free time but I have to be honest and tell you…I had no life.  I worked, went home, went to the grocery store, went home, got gas, went home, worked, went home…you get it?  I was LAME!  That’s a general way of saying it, a more honest and accurate way of saying it is I was isolated.  At this point in my life, I am so far from isolated it isn’t even funny so when the little one went on an adventure, I went on my own.  I still had to work but after work, I spontaneously met friends for dinner.  I went to the movies.  I came home and enjoyed the silence.  I blogged.  I went ball-room dancing.  I signed up for kick-boxing.  I even hit the streets and was flattered by 23 and 24-year-old boy-men mistaking me for being their age.  It was humorous and FUN!  LAST WEEK I HAD FUN!

At times life can throw so many things at people.  I know sometimes I think I’m standing firm, walking around with my “yeah, I got this” persona and two days later I’m crying in the car, screaming “Why does everything keep piling up? Why does it always have to be when it rains, it pours?”.  It sounds semi-schizophrenic but don’t front, you do it too.  It’s life!  Life is like that.  Life throws curve balls right when we  know we have things under control.  In the midst of all of that “life” you can begin to get weighed down.  You can begin to forget who you are; slowly becoming task masters and nothing more.  Kid(s) fed – check, drop kids at school – check, 8 hours at work – check, grocery store pit stop – check, dinner cooked and served – check, bath-time – check, kid(s) in bed – check, fall out in bed exhausted and wait to do it again in 8 hours – CHECK! DON”T ALLOW LIFE TO DO THIS TO YOU!  Remember to have FUN! Keep fun in your life because it allows you to keep perspective…and we need perspective so much.  Having fun keeps you from taking things so seriously and keeps the balance.  It can’t be all or nothing and when it is you enter a dangerous place. So when you dream – dream big, dream fun, dream adventure and excitement.  Be sure to keep some fun in your dreams, even if they are serious, focused dreams.  Keeping the fun in your dreams will help you accomplish them so much faster…and who wants to argue with that!

WHAT IS YOUR DREAM?

The “F” Word

About an hour ago I sat down at my computer to start writing this post on a specific topic.  Something funny happened though.  Nothing came out.  I was sitting at this computer for 30 minutes with nothing clear coming to me.  I even decided to do a writing exercise which advises to start writing whatever comes to mind with no thought to if it makes sense, if it is logical, punctuation, etc. with the hope that it kick starts the writing process.  It didn’t do a thing for me.  And you know what?  It’s no surprise that it didn’t.  I was sitting on my couch with my laptop on my lap, the TV (and volume) on, food cooking on the stove and some texting in between.  Did I seriously think that anything that would move the topic of this blog forward would come to mind?  I was not focused in any way shape or form.  It doesn’t take a genius to figure out why that wasn’t working for me.

Fast forward an hour, the TV is on but muted and I’m not looking at it (it provides some odd type of comfort to have it on at times, even if I’m not paying attention to it).  My phone is silenced, the food is done cooking and I’ve written the paragraph above.  I know exactly where I’m going with this.  Do you know why? (Humor me, pleeeaase…)  I’m focused!!

Focus is such an amazing and crucial factor in the journey to accomplishing almost anything.  I really want to leave the “almost” out but a wise man taught me not to speak in absolutes because there’s always an exception.  Let me tell you a story of a fellow Relentless Dreamer.  She’s in a amazing position in her life right now.  She started a business years ago and always dreamed of leaving her full-time job to pursue her business full-time.  Well, God opened that door for her and now she’s not working at her old job anymore and is doing exactly what she desires, working on building her business.  The business has 2 aspects that don’t really go hand in hand but they are both passions of hers so she wanted to do both through her business.  In the last few weeks, something amazing has happened.  She has made leaps and bounds in her thought process and actions toward getting her business off the ground and a big part of that is because she came to the realization that she cannot market or work a business that is going in two different directions.  She realized that as much as loves both of those aspects, they don’t work together.  She decided to focus on the one part of the business that she truly wants to grow and has begun eliminating the other side of the business, both mentally and physically.  I can hear the drive, the passion and the excitement when she talks about her business now and I promise you this active movement (in all ways) came after she realized she had to focus the business.  She and I were talking one day and she said something to the affect of “I tell you, focus is amazing!  I know exactly what I need to do” or was it “I know exactly where I’m going”?  It’s something like that!  I did say “something to the affects”.  😐  Lets just say that I remember that the revelation in the statement was that once she got FOCUS it was on and poppin’ and that’s what’s important here.

The other night I was watching a video of Dominique Dawes discussing the gold metal win of Gabrielle Douglas and the history she made.  (I have got to say, that young woman is amazing! I am so proud of her.  I saw everything but her floor exercise and am kind of bummed about that.  I can’t find it on YouTube either.  Help me out, y’all!  Oooh…FOCUS!  Dang!  Ok…refocused.)  I bring this up because Dominique said that Gabby is the most talented gymnast she’s seen.  However, what was more important to her win was that her coach did what he had to do for Gabby to keep her mind FOCUSED on the task at hand.  Dominique said that if her mind weren’t focused, regardless of her talent and athletic abilities, we could have seen a different performance and that was ultimately what was so amazing.  Gabby had her mental and physical focus in sync, which allowed her to make history and bring home the gold!

So, where are you with this in relation to your dreams?  Are you focused?  If you aren’t, why not?  What’s getting in the way?  What’s clouding your head and thoughts?  Do you teeter totter between ideas/desires? If so, why? Take some time to figure out the answers to these questions so that you can eliminate and/or realize whatever the answers are for you.  Figure out what you really want or what you ultimately want.  There are many paths to get to the same place so focus on what the end result is, then focus on the best singular way for you to get there.  Once you gain focus, the path is so much clearer.  Good luck!

It’s All In The Approach

2 Year Dream

Here’s the story behind the text.  For years I have wanted to take a variety of classes, including Ballroom dancing.  I looked at studios, called and got pricing and chose a time to go check it out.  Some studios have drop in classes so I could show up and pay $10 to check out the class to see if I like it before signing up for a full session.  I have made sure to put the class on my calendar, go home to get dressed for the class and at the last minute, when I was supposed to be leaving for class, completely change my mind and stay home (doing nothing).  I am almost (but not quite) embarrassed to admit that I have actually gone to the dance studio, walked in, saw the class participants and walked right back out, got into my car and went home.  You would think the teacher looked mean or the participants looked completely in shape or maybe there was a wizard in the class with flairs coming out of his ears.  None of the above!  I just punked out…utterly and completely.  Shamefully…

Fast forward to two weeks ago.  I volunteered myself to plan a celebration for a group that I belonged to and in the planning process I decided to try something “different”.  While searching for something “different” I came across a Ballroom dance studio that hosts free classes and an open house/party.  I decided to book this for our celebration and we went.  It was a blast, maybe the most fun I’ve had in about a year.  Everyone enjoyed themselves.  The instructors made the steps so basic that many of us were shocked at the ease of learning the dances.  Everyone danced, no one was shy or inhibited, and it was just plain pure fun.

My friend knew of my desire to go to a Ballroom dancing class and sent me the text above, congratulating me.  I was excited that I actually completed something I told him I wanted to do.  However, after a pause, the stated date sunk in and I thought “what in the world?! I said that two years ago?!”.  It took me two documented years to complete taking a ballroom dancing class.  First, CONGRATULATIONS TO ME!  I would never minimize the completion of a dream, no matter how long it takes so that deserves some kudos.  However, for something so available, I’d be doing myself a disservice if I didn’t take a moment to stop and think about why it took me so long to do this.

My conclusion is…FEAR! FEAR! FEAR!  Oooh, I was scared!  I was scared of trying something new.  I was scared of strangers seeing me doing something that was completely foreign to me.  (I mean at some point, I’m sure I’d look like a fool! – but that’s really okay.)  I was scared to be vulnerable.  I was scared to venture into the unknown.  I was scared to spend money on something fun.  I was scared to…hmm…I was just plain old scared!  Fear got me to delay this dream of ballroom dancing for at least two years (that’s just when I told my friend, not the first time I thought of it).  Fear is a powerful thing and can hinder so many dreams if you let it.  What I learned when finally taking this class was that the fear was gone because of the way I set it up.  Meaning, maybe the way a dream is approached can affect your feelings around it and/or how soon you move toward accomplishing it.  The next time you want to do something new or move toward one of your dreams, try thinking about it differently.  Here are some ideas to change the way we think about approaching dreams.

  • Grab a buddy – ask a friend to try the class/dream with you
  • Look for introductory classes/open houses – most people attending will probably be beginners
  • Make an event of it so you’re excited about the event and not the actual thing you’re doing
  • Compile a cheering squad – many people will be thrilled to support you in your dream
  • Stick to the basics when starting to get your feet wet
  • Start a “Fun” account and put $10-$20 into it each pay period so money is available when you come up with something new to try

Dreaming In The Present

When will your life start? Will it be when you get that new car? How about when you get that new job or when you get married; maybe when you start to travel or finally get the dog you’ve wished for your whole life? What if you weren’t bullied as a child or you got into your dream college instead of your 2nd choice or you took that trip to China five years ago…life would be great now, wouldn’t it?!

I think a lot of people tend to have these thoughts. For the longest time I lived my life in the past and the future (yes! at the same time) but never in the present. I would work towards something and once I was close to achieving it (mind you, I hadn’t achieved it yet), my mind would move to whatever was next on my never ending list. At the same time that I was trying to catch my future, I’d resent what did and/or didn’t happen in my childhood, things “friends” did to me, opportunities I didn’t get (pretty sad actually-if you can relate to this, please know this is a victim mentality and you are not a victim). What kind of life is that?! I can tell you…a terrible one!

Here’s what I’m learning now, when you focus on what you want in your life today and actively work towards it each day, you will be living in the moment by default! If you focus on what step you can take today, you aren’t thinking about the future or the past. When you decide to take a step towards your dreams each a day, instead of wishing you had a better paying job before you decide to plan to travel to China, you begin to gain momentum. It provides you with a goal (and a passion) for you to move in TODAY and when you focus on something to do TODAY towards your dreams, you are living in this moment; you are living in the present. You are learning to enjoy the moment and are learning to enjoy the journey. There’s more than a good chance that this process will even spark some creativity (you may not have known you had) and you begin to come up with other ways to help yourself reach to that dream faster.

Starting today, change your wishing and wanting to active action towards your dreams. Enjoy the process. As you actively work this process, your brain will start to focus on today, focus on where you are now and what you can do right now. Move in that and enjoy the moment, step by step towards your dreams.

Blame it on the book!

My favorite “secret” is the triple daily dose of emails that I get providing me with the day’s free eBooks through one of the world’s top online stores.  I peruse through these emails, quickly reading through the book descriptions (never the covers) waiting for something to catch my eye.  A few months ago “The Dream Manager” by Matthew Kelly begged me to stop and check it out.  It passed my “download test” and I got the book, not having a clue as to when I would actually read it.  For reasons unknown to myself, I started reading the book within a few days of downloading it and finished it in one day.  Prior to this reading, many things occurred in my life which brought me to several points, a few of them being: I was tired of going through life and wishing for more; overcoming fear to be able to do the things I’ve been wishing for and seeing the amazing effects in my life that came from having a support system.  Days after reading “The Dream Manager” I wondered “what would it be like if I started such a group?”.  The book provided the blueprint of how to start this type group in a workplace so how hard could it be to translate that to a personal group?

My excitement got the best of me and I started writing an email.  I didn’t have a clear direction of where it was going and I had no idea who it was going to, I just had to write it.  My excitement was contagious, at least it felt like it to me, and I ran with it.  Names started popping into my head and I dove in “her, her….yeah her too, her…oh MAN, YES HER!”.  Before I could put any true thought into what I was doing I sent this email to almost 15 women with the grand idea to start a Dream group.  A group that would support, encourage, provide assistance and love each other as we face fears, struggles, and elation on the paths to fulfill our dreams.  I believed this book, I believed the change it said could and would take place and I wanted it…I needed it and figured some other women needed it too.  Before I knew it, I was getting responses and everyone wanted to partake!  That’s when it hit me!

What in the world did I just get myself into?!  SERIOUSLY!  I had to sit back and think this through.  I’ve never led anything, forget a group with real live people.  I had recently just finished the first challenging thing in my life in years (a cover up way of saying I usually quit things when it gets hard).  I thought “if I do this people will look to me for guidance”.  Again, WHAT IN THE WORLD DID I GET MYSELF INTO?!  I sat back, said a little prayer and that’s when it hit me…it wasn’t me.  If it were me I wouldn’t have written the email, if it were me I wouldn’t have “chosen” those particular women, if it were me, instead of pressing “send” I would have hit “discard”.  My head became clear again and my body returned to its peaceful state.  I realized this was above me, this was bigger than me and that God temporarily made me insane so that I could move in His will. 🙂  God really trips me out sometimes.  He invented the saying “when there’s a will there’s a way” (or I’d like to believe that for this sentence to make sense) and this is His will and that was His way.

Like I said earlier, the response was an overwhelming “I’m IN!” so I moved quickly. I set up the first meeting, found a great inspirational photo to include in the evite, found some poems about dreaming, composed a “Hey, let’s do this!” message and hit “send”…again!  This time I was in my right state of mind.  I knew I was being led to do this, for me and for these women.  Some women are already friends, some don’t know each other at all, some are childless, others have multiple children; we are single, we are married, we are southern, we are northern, we are black, white and in between but we are WOMEN WITH DREAMS! Dreams that we are determined to live, regardless of what circumstances present themselves to us.  We will not be guided by our circumstances but rather be the guides of our lives.  These are our stories…